Bloody Colonials is a new Australian murder mystery set in an early penal settlement. Convict detective Seamus “Shameless” Halloran stumbles on foul play but doesn’t dare tell anyone in authority since they’ll give no credence to a convict’s accusations. So the sharp but shabby Irishman conscripts newly-arrived young colonial surgeon Dr Tom Quayle as his ally and respectable front. From here on, it’ll be full-tilt tension and hilarity for the oddly-matched duo.

Bloody Colonials brims with mystery, romance, dark humour and poignancy — mixed with barbed satire on power, pretension and the seeds of modern Australia.

This is the first novel by award-winning journalist, broadcaster, satirist, playwright and singer-songwriter Stafford Sanders – a literature and history graduate who among other adventures has reported from the Amazon and performed on Countdown in a sailor suit.

Stafford got the idea for Bloody Colonials while writing comedy for radio and TV. He first developed the story as a screenplay before working it into a novel.

Now, in an 14 part series, with Stafford reading the book, you can listen to this charming piece of writing courtesy of the public reading station 2RPH.


Bloody Colonials is readily available through all major outlets. In Australia we recommend Angus and Robertson, available here. Also available through Australia’s largest online Bookstore, Booktopia, here. Internationally Bloody Colonials is available through Amazon, here.


TO LISTEN TO ALL THE EPISODES ON 2RPH GO HERE.


EXTRACT

“Halloran!” barked Bascombe as we drew up in front of the stables. There was no immediate response to this, so he repeated more loudly:

“Halloran!” And for good measure, “Get your lazy bog-Irish arse out here at once!”

At this pleasant imprecation, a rather pot-bellied fellow of indeterminately middle age, dressed in shabby arrow-headed garb, emerged from the stables – prattling in an almost theatrical Irish brogue like some captured pantomime leprechaun about to grant a wish:  “Here I am, sir, at your service. Sure an’ it’s a lovely mornin’!  What can I be doin’ for you two good gentlemen?”

“Cut the paddy palaver, Halloran,” snapped the Major. “Dr Quayle here” (with a perfunctory nod at me) “is our new colonial surgeon. He’ll be needing a horse. A good one, mind, not your usual nags.”

“Ah, delighted to meet you, doctor,” said the smiling stablehand, turning towards me. At once I felt that the crinkled, weatherworn visage and the jovial Irish accent were somewhat familiar. I looked at him more closely as he grinned and gestured, his pupils darting about like deranged mosquitoes trying to escape from his head, his genial patter rattling onward:

“Welcome to Port Fortitude. I’ll be gettin’ you saddled up then, sir – since I am as you might say, saddled with that responsibility (ha ha)!”  His mobile, fleshy face creased readily into an enormous grin as he chuckled at his own rather weak jape. 

Bascombe, clearly at the end of his patience – which, it could be assumed, did not extend far at the best of times with regard to this Irishman – rolled his eyes and snarled icily at him: “Shut up and get on with it.”


Bloody Colonials is readily available in both paperback and digital through all major outlets. In Australia we recommend Angus and Robertson, available here. Also available through Australia’s largest online Bookstore, Booktopia, here. Internationally Bloody Colonials is available through Amazon, here.


TO LISTEN TO ALL THE EPISODES ON 2RP GO HERE.